I Love Squirrels

My recent acquisition of the Squirrelinator, an air rifle that can deliver a pellet about the size of a peppercorn to a precision target 30 yards away at speeds up to 1000 fps has caused some of you to call me a squirrel hater. I just want to set the record straight.

The grey squirrels that live in our area are cute little critters with grey-brown fur, long beautiful tails, and a personality that seems at times adventurous, playful, brave, and pesky. To say that they're cute understates the image of one of these small animals perched in a standing position, large black eyes wide open, nibbling on a seed held in their human-like hands while occasionally flicking that huge bushy tail. There is something artful about the rhythmic ripple that their body and tail make when they hop about.

We've all seen the videos of their cunning (Mission Impossible), flying skills (Squirrel Launcher, Squirrel Catapult), or even their water sports (Twiggy, The Water Skiiing Squirrel). But the fact is: squirrels are notorious thieves. They are so clever at thwarting obstacles, that an entire industry exists to provide ingenious squirrel baffles for birdfeeders. Last year, nearly the entire crop of figs from our single fig tree were eaten by squirrels just a couple days before each fruit was ripe enough to pick (I guess they like 'em a little tart).

My father was a successful hunter and trapper of many types of animals in southwestern Iowa, so I'll confess, I have eaten squirrel, and may do so again some day, but their meat is not particularly tasty; it resembles rabbit except it is a little tougher, and there isn't a whole lot of it to begin with. Kind of like quail - it takes many to make a family meal.

In our neighborhood, there many berry bushes, oak, magnolia, and fruit trees, so the squirrel's plate is quite full. Perfect place to raise a family - and so many do. Many, many do! But there are also foxes, owls, hawks, snakes, coyotes, and who knows what critters, who all love to dine on squirrels. I'm happy to provide them with a little assistance.

I do love squirrels and hope they enjoy their spot in Nature's grand scheme. I just love Spyke's Habitat Fig Preserves much, much more.